Aletheia
by Dark Glass Marionette
Summary: For it is all evident, even the flaws of the most pefect of truths.


**Author's Note: **Roll's here again, and with another Wesker-centric. Finally I get my guts back, lol. Anyway, setting is during RE5 -take it like a hidden scene before the fight in the hangar. That seemed the best moment to make this piece fit. The title, "Aletheia", comes from Greek and the literal meaning (courtesy of Wikipedia) is "the state of being evident". Somehow, I've played with a bit of a flaw I hope some of you have noticed, so here we go. Flaws are evident, no matter what; sometimes, they're discovered later than sooner, but they're still there. Enjoy!^^

**Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil or any of its characters.**

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_[…] Of course, I can't allow myself to fail; there must be no room for such a chance. Everything is going as I planned; I have no worries so far, not even about Excella. She'll soon find out about my _true_ intentions. Bless her naivety, for it has taken us both a very long way. As always, I'll take care of the loose ends I find in my way. There will be nothing and no-one to oppose me. No-one._

_Including Chris._

x x x

_Resident Evil: Aletheia_

_"You have to learn the rules of the game, and then you have to play better than anyone else." Einstein  
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x x x

I had no time to waste, I was close to the end of all this and it was at this point that I needed to fully concentrate on the matters at hand; however, it was all for naught. I feel compelled to write down these thoughts on some stray and trivial piece of paper, but now I can see they have some importance to them. The meaning behind them escapes me so far, though. I would've never done this given my tendency to keep everything under anonymity's cloak, but I have to: I _need_ to, strangely enough. One, people say, never knows himself entirely. Whilst that may be true, I have no need to dig deeper into myself and unnecessarily learn about that which I'm already aware of. Still, I have come to learn something odd, seemingly a meaningless quirk, but I was wrong.

I've learnt I can hesitate.

I haven't been stripped of that capability, no; in fact, I had felt it not long ago. No matter how strong, conviction always quivers under the violent waves of one's personal instability. This time was different though. It had bored a hole right through me, one that would not heal until I saw my plans fulfilled and reach their climax. This time, I didn't doubt my resources or my plans themselves, neither did I doubt my capability to dispose of certain pawns and assets in my game; I had no mercy. I could certainly take them head on; I had the power to do so... but that was what troubled me the most. I knew I was seen like a fearless man: they were not wrong, in another certain way, of course.

I will not lie, though now I wonder when have I decided to be honest and sincere. I am a man of many lies, so I expect not to be trusted. But I digress; that is not exactly my point here.

Outside I show no emotion -obviously not fear- but quite in truth, right now I somehow doubt myself and everything I have done until this juncture. It's not a matter of guts or courage -concepts that are mere hollow words for me- but a matter of utter selfishness and pride. "The bigger they are, the harder they fall", or so the saying and its many variants say, and the falls indeed hurt. Consider it masochism against oneself, but I have hurt my own ego because of the doubts I harbor. I have no reason to hesitate, so I told myself... that was until I faced the facts. As much as I wanted to avoid frustration at this crucial point, I had to admit I was flawed and, as such, my thinking was flawed.

My own plan has seemingly no flaws in itself: I know which steps to take and which to retrace back, but therein lies its flaw. In truth, whilst not lacking purpose, my plan has heads: what it lacks is tails. What is my point with what I've so much worked to brew? I know what I'm looking for, I know which is my goal, but deep down I think I am much oblivious to it. As I said, conviction cracks ignoring all rules we might beset it with, and it may be my moment to feel how it cracks. I may have reached perfection, but I am quite far from it. No matter who much I try -and it does get frustrating- it keeps slipping away.

The first stages of my plan were completed and quite accounted for, but my attention had fallen short. When I first spoke about finding superior DNA to bring mankind to its next step, to force its evolution, I was immediately pondering about how to proceed and make it happen. The only way to usher in the changes was to test the completed virus on me and watch its and my reaction. Knowing what that miserable bastard Spencer had done to me and many others like me, also considering I was 'adaptable' to all kinds of Progenitor strains, I had to carry out the tests. We were unique, _I _was unique... the rest of my kin were all dead. I was my only choice, my only solution left; the virus would reject any other host. I carried out the tests... it was true: the virus would accept no-one except me. There, I noticed, was my mistake. Believe me, I do not make them.

I came to palliate my frustration through starting numerous, almost infinite tests with other subject I was helped to abduct; despite knowing I would fail, I mindlessly tried, never to give up on my seemingly senseless quest. Every time I'd looked for something, I had found it; I had no reason to believe otherwise. So I kept looking, searching and testing: not many met my expectations. Some did find their way and survived the initial stages, but they perished eventually. Whilst it was true that, at the same time, Jill was making excellent progress, my calm was short-lived. It was too good to be true.

Everything that has a beginning has an end, and so this time of frenzy and rush met its 'demise'. I wouldn't put it so bluntly, but I indeed gave up. I stopped trying to find non-existent answers to non-existent matters, because there hadn't been any matter to begin with. It had just been my reluctance to admit it. I finally accepted the flawed nature of my plan: it would never succeed like I planned it to. On one hand, it would help me literally clean the world and raid the field of all the chaff, but what next? I believe it's not hard to suppose.

I'd be a survivor with a lone existence, close to meaningless. I have not come this far to see everything prove itself to be in vain, no, but perhaps this is something I didn't account for, much to my dismay. Perhaps it's been my headstrong nature what has lead me to make a mistake, maybe my obsession if we were to see it from someone else's point of view, but as Edison once said, I'm not going insane: I've just found ten thousand ways that won't work. I think ahead, I have plans and secondary plans for the future, but there is only so much one can do. Unfortunately, it applied all the same to me.

The rest, though, wasn't hindered by this setback. My plans would still be in motion, working like an unstoppable clock, and I'd be ready to face what was coming. I could find some kind of... upside to this precarious situation of mine: I'd get to put Chris out of his misery and strip him of his existence. I had shed my previous nature, of course not involuntarily, but he had stolen it long ago, long before the Mansion incident... _long ago_. By taking Jill, I had taken away almost _everything_ he was. If there is something I do not lack, that is insight and I put it to quite the good use.

I knew him like the back of my hand. He was predictable; you could see him coming miles away. Dealing with him was actually tiring and, in a way, boring and uninteresting. He had the undying tendency of facing me head on, so retaliating was as easy as breaking a toothpick and discarding it. His pattern never changed: he was destined to fail. Yet he keeps trying, I'll hand that to him, but that's no reason to hold him on high regard. Still, I don't yet know if he'll ever have the upper hand, which is something I will strive to prevent. I've always been sure the victory would be mine, that I would prevail, but it's not so easy to keep your beliefs straight when critics, accusations and black-and-white mindsets accost it relentlessly.

Then again, since when have I been concerned about those?

Though when had I been concerned about something? Maybe for brief moments, the most trivial of them, but nothing I couldn't handle. I'm confident, I am sure of everything, so I don't see why I should stray from that path. In fact, I will live after this day and carry on as always; there's nothing Chris can do against it. He may be able to buy the world some time, but completely foil my plans? That will not happen, not this time.

That is the truth, simple and straight...

Flawed and imperfect.

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_A/N: So, how was it? I think I haven't gotten THAT rusty, have I? In any case, speaking of flaws, whatever stupid details you see to this, point them out. Pwetty please? xDDD_

_Reviews are appreciated!^^  
_


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